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January 06, 2022

Good Morning Friends & Digital Neighbors! Blessed Feast of the Epiphany! Christmas was only 13 days ago, and for so many it is an eternity ago. Is it a natural trait that we rush forward without savoring the moment or is it a modern trend because of our fascination with the new or what's next? I would like to think it is a modern affliction rather than out natural inclination, we just adapt to the environment and the times knowingly or unknowingly. Hmm, on to the Oxymoronica!

A few quotes on parenting which is such a demanding and amazing vocation in life. Prayers for all of your parents out there - one with all of their children raised and those still in the works. I can't imagine anything more important that being entrusted with the humanization, education and formation of another after you have seriously examined that reality for yourself. Most people don't seem to realize that they need to do that for themselves before they get entrusted with a little bundle of potential. Prayer for the many I have met along the path and have survived bad parents and very fractured relationships within their families.

To receive applause for works which do not demand all our powers hinders our advance towards a perfecting of our spirit. It usually means that thereafter we stand still. - G. C. Lichtenberg

Being out of circulation in the seminary doing my own formation, I missed all the concern about self-esteem. Whatever you think about self-esteem for children or adults, I think the easier route to developing confidence and competency (which seems to be what we called those realities before they were bundled in self-esteem) are age and ability appropriate challenges that stimulate growth while avoiding empty praise. Sounds easy, I wish it were. I was a fan of the public education I received in 70's & 80's - such an awesome endeavor to try and education and form so many different individuals. It was a grand project especially when a culture tries to balance unity and diversity. We talk so much about diversity in the last 20 - 30 years, unity has been frayed as an intended or unintended consequence.

Permissiveness is the principle of treating children as if they were adults; and the tactic of making sure they never reach that stage. - Thomas Szasz

Not a given that bad parenting will lead to stunted children and then adults, but it is often the case. Life is surprising, sometimes inept adults can manage to raise competent and confident children. More often than not I have seen the opposite. I am not sure if the competent and confident parents were undermined by the education system, the culture or just misfortune in the mix of individuals and experience. This final quote from Heywood Broun gives me hope. While I have a fondness for the weirdos, the marginal, and the underdogs, I love all the "normies" too, each person probably has a little bag of peculiarities that they are les than public about in life. The things we share with closer friends and in more personal moments. Happy Thursday Friends! Merry Christmas & Happy New Year on this Feast of the Epiphany. 🎄

The average child is an almost non-existent myth. To be normal one must be peculiar in some way or another. - Heywood Broun

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Voltaire's birthday 11-21-1694 - A brief essay by Steve Weidenkopf

Today marks the three hundred and thirtieth birthday of the Frenchman François-Marie Arouet, better known by his nom de plume, Voltaire (1694-1778).

Born into a bourgeois family during the reign of Louis XIV, the “Sun King” (r. 1643-1715), Voltaire suffered tragedy at a young age when his mother died. Never close with his father or brother, Voltaire exhibited a rebellious attitude toward authority from his youth. His brilliant mind was fostered in the care of the Society of Jesus, who introduced him to the joys of literature and theater. Despite his later criticisms against the Church, Voltaire, throughout his life, fondly recalled his dedicated Jesuit teachers.

Although he spent time as a civil servant in the French embassy to the Hague, Voltaire’s main love was writing—an endeavor where he excelled in various genres, including poetry, which led to his appointment as the royal court poet for King Louis XV. Widely recognized as one of the greatest French writers, and even hyperbolically referred to by ...

Voltaire's birthday 11-21-1694 - A brief essay by Steve Weidenkopf
January 01, 2026
2026 Teams Talk @ Padre's

Padre - Tom Miller invites you to a Coffee Talk, Speakeasies, Schmoozes, Tea Times, Afterhours and other gatherings.

https://teams.live.com/meet/93792382189049?p=DiBHsYfuECPgDrG7vO

2026 Coffee Talk with the ADD Irregulars
Thursday, January 1, 2026
6:00 AM - 8:00 AM (CST)
Occurs every day starting 1/1 until 12/31/2027

Coffee Talk - Daily beginning at 6:00 AM Central Time Zone - USA

White Pilled Wednesday - A break from the heaviness of news and current events to focus upon things more personal & positive for the first hour of Coffee Talk.

Afternoon Chats - Most Tuesday, Friday & Sundays 2:00 PM Central

Other chats as posted in the community. 

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Thoughts on Alan - Updated with Alan's e-mail address

Dear ADD Irregulars,

Alan has decided to step away from our community for a while. He may return, but right now he’s in a difficult chapter of life. This past year has been especially rough for him—depression, anxiety, unemployment, and some challenging family situations.

I spoke with him briefly on Telegram. He admitted to feeling worn down, and the recent football meme hit him at exactly the wrong moment and in the wrong state of mind. He didn’t sound like he was blaming Rich, but in his current vulnerability, he experienced the exchange as unnecessarily mean-spirited. I suspect the “whiny-cunt” line cut much deeper than it normally would have.

That’s the funny and frightening thing about emotions: on a good day, that back-and-forth between Alan and Rich would have been hilarious. On a bad day, it was simply too much. No one could have known beforehand.

In Alan’s own words: “I saw it at exactly the wrong moment and it just hit me as unnecessarily mean spirited which was something I just didn't expect and am really not in a place to cope with at the moment.”

This is the danger of this medium. We log on hoping for relief or distraction, and instead we sometimes encounter something that offends, outrages, or wounds us. I feel for Alan—I know from previous conversations that this has not been a good year for him.

Let this be a reminder to all of us: Do not venture onto the internet when you’re in a state of emotional vulnerability. It rarely goes the way we hope. Pressure always seeks an escape valve, and online spaces are full of sharp edges. It is far better to talk with a real person—call someone and hear a human voice with all its nuance—than to stare at static words on a screen that you can reread over and over, each time deepening the wound.

Praying for Alan and so sorry he is at this chapter in his life. I am guessing he might be open to any of us reaching out. I don't really know.  I know he is still on telegram, but not sure how esle to contact him.

Rich, if you read this I hope you chalk it under unfortunate shit happens. On most other days that post would have generated the funny back and forth that we have seen many times in the past.  I am sure Alan would be open to any conversation with you, that is an invitation never an expectation. 

[email protected]  For anyone who might want to contact Alan. 

 

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